Top 10 FBI Behavioral Unit Techniques For Building Rapport With Anyone
bin Dreeke is head of the FBI's Counterintelligence Behavioral Analysis Program. In his book It's Not All About "Me": The Top Ten Techniques for Building Quick Rapport with Anyone he simply and clearly spells out methods for connecting with people. Here's a quick breakdown of the methods. 1) Establish artificial time constraints Nobody wants to feel trapped in an awkward conversation with a stranger. Robin often begins a conversation with something along the lines of "I'm on my way out but before…
6 minutes
Mastering The Art Of Conversation: 7 Steps To Being Smooth
The Art of Conversation: A Guided Tour of a Neglected Pleasure, Catherine Blyth gives some great tips on handling the subtle nuances of polite interaction. Here are seven of my favorite bits: How To Make Small Talk Via The Art of Conversation: A Guided Tour of a Neglected Pleasure: Whatever the context, old friends or new, it is best if speakers respect five principles: Put others at ease Put yourself at ease Weave in all parties Establish shared interests Actively pursue…
3 minutes
How To Be More Confident: 5 Research Backed Methods
one doubts the value of confidence. In fact, research shows people often prefer confidence over actual expertise. G. Richard Shell teaches at the Wharton School and his book Springboard: Launching Your Personal Search for Success has a great chapter on how to be more confident. Here's what you need to know. Surround Yourself With People Who Believe in You I've posted a lot about how the power of context can improve behavior. And people are a part of that. When you're told you're…
4 minutes
How To Make People Like You: 6 Science-Based Conversation Hacks
you want to know how to make people like you? It's easier than you think. A while back I posted about how to master conversation skills. Here are 6 more research-backed tips: 1) Encourage people to talk about themselves It gives their brain as much pleasure as food or money: Talking about ourselves—whether in a personal conversation or through social media sites like Facebook and Twitter—triggers the same sensation of pleasure in the brain as food or money, researchers…
4 minutes
Signs Of Lying: Here’s What Will And Will Not Help You Detect Lies
ing well is hard -- but not in the way you might think. We usually look for nervousness as one of the signs of lying. Like the person is worried about getting caught. But that's actually a weak predictor. Some people are so confident they don't fear getting caught. Others are great at hiding it. Some get nervous when questioned so you get false positives. And others are lying to themselves -- so they show no signs of deliberate deception.…
4 minutes
How To Win Every Argument
you want to know how to win every argument? Stop trying. Not that passivity is the most effective strategy but if you're thinking about "winning" you're already headed down the wrong path. From a neuroscience perspective, "When an argument starts, persuasion stops." Via Compelling People: The Hidden Qualities That Make Us Influential: When an argument starts, persuasion stops. A group of researchers including psychologist Drew Westen conducted a revealing experiment, which Westen wrote about in his book The Political…
4 minutes
Negotiation Tactics: The 10 Minute MBA Course On Negotiation
nt to learn the negotiation tactics of an MBA? I've cleaned up and distilled notes from the excellent negotiating course I took in MBA school taught by MIT lecturer John Richardson. Preparation Always, do your homework. Success in negotiation is strongly correlated with time spent preparing. Preparing in a group helps; others will come up with things you didn't. Be ambitious. There's usually a connection between aspiration level and what people get. (Obviously, you can go too far, so look…
5 minutes
Susan Cain Interview: 5 Things You Need To Know About Introverts
san Cain is the New York Times bestselling author of Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking. It's one of the best books I read last year and I've posted about it numerous times (here, here, here and here.) Her wonderful TED talk on the subject has nearly 5 million views: Susan and I discussed how introverts and extroverts should best deal with each other, what we can all learn from introverts, and how she…
5 minutes
