Category: Have Great Relationships

Be Happier

Can one personality trait determine your future?

search is pointing to conscientiousness as the one-trait-to-rule-them-all in terms of future success, both career-wise and personal. Via How Children Succeed: Grit, Curiosity, and the Hidden Power of Character: "It would actually be nice if there were some negative things that went along with conscientiousness," Roberts told me. "But at this point it's emerging as one of the primary dimensions of successful functioning across the lifespan. It really goes cradle to grave in terms of how people do." What is it? Basically,…


3 minutes
Have Great Friends

What’s a simple thing that can improve a first impression?

bsp; A handshake really does make a difference. Via Science Daily: The study was led by Beckman Institute researcher Florin Dolcos and Department of Psychology postdoctoral research associate Sanda Dolcos. They found, as they wrote, that "a handshake preceding social interaction enhanced the positive impact of approach and diminished the negative impact of avoidance behavior on the evaluation of social interaction." And: "We found that it not only increases the positive effect toward a favorable interaction, but it also diminishes…


1 min read
Be A Great Communicator

The 5 Keys To A Good Apology

ologies do make a difference. People often prefer them over money, even if they're just cheap talk. What does the research say about the best way to apologize?   One Don't apologize for what you think you did wrong. Apologize for what they think you did wrong: ...victims reacted most positively to apologies that were congruent with their self-construals.   Two The most effective apologies have four parts: Via Wait: The Art and Science of Delay: Aaron Lazare devotes two…


2 minutes
Have A Great Family

Why do we play?

y do we play? We play in order to learn: Via Play: How it Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination, and Invigorates the Soul: Play creates new neural connections and tests them. It creates an arena for social interaction and learning. It creates a low-risk format for finding and developing innate skills and talents. How does this work? When something is fun, it commands our full attention and provides an emotional reward, two things that are key to strengthening memory:…


4 minutes
Be Happier

How technology can make you happier

ny say technology is tearing us apart but studies generally show that tech and the internet make us happier. What gives? There's certainly a near-term and long-term difference: your brain loves things that give you more options even if too many choices end up making you miserable. (Humans aren't always rational. Welcome to Earth.) More relevant, technology is a tool, and it's all about what you do with it. Research has shown time and time again that what makes you…


3 minutes
Be Sexier

Will eating healthier make you sexier?

ting 3.3 servings or more of fruits and vegetables made research subjects notably more attractive. Via LA Times: On average, a difference of about 2.9 servings of fruits and vegetables a day was enough for the students to discriminate on the basis of healthy appearance, with more servings associated with looking healthier. Similarly, about 3.3 servings a day was enough for them to discriminate on the basis of attractiveness — with more servings associated with better looks. (A caveat: One…


1 min read
Have Great Friends

Here’s How To Know Who Your Real Friends Are

ok at your phone texting and calling patterns. Scientists are realizing they give powerful insights about relationships. Via Sciencemag.org: Just by analyzing the calling patterns, the researchers could accurately label two people as friends or nonfriends more than 95% of the time. But the results, published online today in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, show that the mobile phone data were better at predicting friendship than the subjects themselves. Thirty-two pairs of subjects switched from calling each other…


3 minutes
Be Sexier

Do clever pick-up lines really work?

men prefer innocuous opening lines vs direct or clever lines. Men prefer women to be direct. Via Scott Barry Kaufman: In the '80s, Chris Kleinke and colleagues analyzed the effectiveness of 100  pick-up lines across a number of different settings, including bars, supermarkets, restaurants, laundromats, and beaches. They found three main categories of openers: direct gambits, which are honest and get right to the point (e.g, "I'm sort of shy, but I'd like to get to know you"), innocuous gambits, which hide a person's true…


1 min read

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