don’t need to tell you that you shouldn’t send $500 to someone claiming to be a stranded astronaut trying to get back to Earth. Or that if some guy calling himself the “Royal Commander of the International Refunds Bureau” asks for your PayPal login, you shouldn’t give it to him. If a stranger texts saying, “Hello, dearest, you seem trustworthy and strong” you know that’s not how people talk. That’s how villains in telenovelas address their enemies before stealing…
avel is wonderful. It promises enlightenment, new experiences, and the smug satisfaction of saying, “Well, when I was in Portugal...” But traveling these days feels a bit like being punched in the wallet. Modern airlines use a combination of arcane rituals, machine learning, and revenge to set prices. There’s a fee for everything short of blinking. Seat reservation? Extra. Cabin baggage? Extra. Want to sit next to the person you love? Better love them from row 32. You suddenly realize…
ere are days when you feel like you can do anything. And then there are other days… Days where your self-esteem is playing hide and seek, and let's just say it's really good at hiding. You're looking for it like, "Come out, come out, wherever you are," and it's under the bed, snickering and reading old issues of "Inadequate Weekly." We hear a lot about how to increase self-esteem. Unfortunately, most of that stuff should be filed under “Hooey and…
all reach a point where we feel hopeless. Your inner monologue sounds like a rejected Alanis Morissette lyric and any level of optimism you possessed is now playing varsity level hide and seek. You’re Cinderella’s ugly stepsister in this fairy tale, and those shoes were never meant for you. You could use a little hope. Yeah, the thing people love to tattoo in cursive on their ribcage next to a butterfly. It’s the kind of word that feels like…
u’ll take roughly 670 million breaths in your lifetime. But we don’t think about breathing much. It’s only when something goes wrong -- like when you’re choking on a chicken nugget -- that you suddenly realize breathing isn’t as optional as it appears. At least with eating, you can skip a few meals. But with breathing, you slack off for even two minutes, and suddenly everyone’s calling an ambulance. Here's the thing: most of us have been breathing wrong. Seriously.…
w Year’s resolutions: the annual ritual of declaring war on your own bad habits while simultaneously proving that you, in fact, are your own worst enemy. “I’m going to learn Spanish, quit caffeine, organize my closet, and become someone who hits the gym every morning!” Aaaaand a few days later, it’s all on fire. New Year’s resolutions failing doesn’t even seem like an accident anymore; it feels as much a part of the tradition as resolutions in the first place.…
ting. It’s the most basic human need, right up there with breathing and arguing on the internet. But we all tend to overdo it, especially around the holidays, when the phrase "biting off more than you can chew" is not a metaphor but a brutal, self-inflicted reality. Now if the weight gain arrived immediately, we’d change our habits. But there’s that sinister lag. It’s only weeks or months later that you notice. Your belt becomes less an accessory and more…
tirement. The mythical Promised Land where every day is a Saturday. No more punching the clock, no more staff meetings, no more pretending to be interested in Sharon’s photos from her third trip to Dollywood. Retirement is often presented like a montage from a pharmaceutical ad: biking through scenic parks with a face radiating pure joy, like you just swallowed a bottle of sunshine. And it can be like that. For a little while. Um, in the beginning, at least……
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