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Apparently, pronouns matter a lot more than you might think in a relationship:
People often complain about those seemingly smug married couples who constantly refer to themselves as “we.” But a new study from the University of California, Berkeley, suggests that spouses who use “we-ness” language are better able to resolve conflicts than those who don’t.
UC Berkeley researchers analyzed conversations between 154 middle-aged and older couples about points of disagreement in their marriages and found that those who used pronouns such as “we,” “our” and “us” behaved more positively toward one another and showed less physiological stress.
In contrast, couples who emphasized their “separateness” by using pronouns such as “I,” “me” and “you” were found to be less satisfied in their marriages. This was especially true for older couples. Their use of separateness pronouns was most strongly linked to unhappy marriages, according to the study.
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